Wednesday, January 23rd, 2008
Of all the stories and posts that have generally burst from my fingertips when I finally sit down at a computer, this one has certainly been the opposite. Being lost in distant thought while my senses were busy absorbing and assimilating new raw surroundings left me exhausted and confused. Cambodia is exploding with change and PEPY (the NGO who organized this ride and many of my friends and family helped me to support) led us right through the center of this force. Three weeks, 980 kilometers, dozens of great projects, hundreds of powerful and positive Cambodians and a million thoughts…
I can’t really explain it but I spent most of my time in Cambodia trying to pull myself back into the present moment. I was riding through the rural backroads of this evolving and healing country with a group of friends and other internationally-minded exciting people and though I wish I could report that I was really “there” the whole time, the truth is I wasn’t.
The thing about biking is that it gives you endless time to think. I love this about it but my thoughts were taking me to other places. The holidays brought me back to my family and friends. The bright young team brought me questions of what comes next after this trip. The getting-to-know-you discussions with new friends brought me troubles in explaining my current relationships. The discussions of my relationships and distant short phone calls at the holidays brought me fears about my chosen commitments.
I was bothered by an inability to connect with the fun interesting people surrounding me and I was annoyed that I was allowing myself to be wrapped up in the meaningless bundle of stress of it all and losing my light curious nature amidst a glorious new experience. Longterm travel takes you places emotionally and I seemed to be holding a first class ticket to the land of introspection on an overbooked flight.
That said, I can tell you that the people, the places and the programs that I discovered while on this cycling trip included some of the most inspiring and moving moments that I’ve encountered on this journey. The PEPY organization has done an amazing job finding and associating themselves with focused talented people, doing the best they can to empower Cambodians to move beyond their troubled past and current challenges. I’m grateful for the chance to see and experience the results of their rewarding dedication and can assure all who supported them or are considering doing so in the future that those funds are moving a new generation of hope and positive change.
I could go on and on about the beaming fresh smiles that greeted us at schools and along the endless red dirt village roads and the warm friendly faces who laughed at our spandex while giving us sugar cane juice and coconut refreshments. The interactions were always sincere and spontaneous and I’ll let the wonderful photos speak for themselves.
My philosophy has been to live every present moment fully and completely but I often felt troubled by being inharmonious with this core goal. However, in the end I realized that I was never really as far from the ideal as I thought. Rather than fight the fact that I wasn’t purely focused on the red dirt that filled my nose and covered my body, the children gleefully squeeling “hello” from their homes and the outstanding team of stellar travellers full of interesting stories, at that moment I just needed to let my mind think. Living that moment meant feeling the distance of my loved ones, the confusion of not knowing my path, the pain of letting things beyond my control go, the weird fear that comes when searching how to do that, the basic desperate irrefutable human need for love (especially children, if even from strangers) and the struggle with the surrounding lives being more challenging yet more simple than anything I could understand. My moment was emotional, it was present and I was exactly where I was meant to be.
For a better picture of the world that was flying by me check my Cambodia, PEPY Ride III gallery.
Also, a guy from the ride created this great detailed Google map of our ride. I hope to make some for other legs of my trip but for now, here’s his version: